The spilled milk

Everything happens for a reason.

This is the mantra I believe in. I am a fatalist. I believe in fate and what it holds for me. All the events that have taken place in my life and around me, I believed that they were all for a reason. I do not panic or cry over spilled milk. I take things in the right attitude. But was I like this always?

No. Life teaches you a lot. We are humans and we have a tendency to doubt every debacle that takes place in front of us. “Why did it happen?” “Why me?” “How will I recover from this?” The questions go on and on.

How about we stop wasting time with these unavailing questions and have faith and carry on. Trust the fact that it must have happened for something good to turn up round the corner. Life is unpredictable.Anything can happen. I have seen people who live life carefully and some who live a carefree life, living each moment. I have experimented a bit of both I believe. First I used to overthink every tiny thing. Every detail would go for a postmortem in my mind leaving me with worry lines on my forehead permanently. It was until my better half asked me to stop worrying ver things which might be superficial. To learn to ignore stuff and just move on. If it has happened, it just have happened for a reason. No need to cry over spilled milk.


So now I am carefree. Trying NOT to overthink every event that takes place in my life. And believe me, it has made my life tad bit easier(life can never be totally easy, but just saying!) So don’t cry over the spilled milk and just carry on with your lives. Whatever happened, happened for a reason.


Tough Love

Ever since I was a kid, I have seen that my parents, especially my father,never coddled me. In fact, not even a little bit. I remember being frustrated by the fact that if I fall down while skating or I hurt myself doing something else my father used to get angry that I don’t take care of myself rather than rushing towards me and coddling me. In an argument if I started to cry or if something major happened with me in school and I shed tears my father would get angry and he would ask me to be tough and not just an ordinary little girl who cries now and then.


When I needed help with something, be it a school project or be it while I was staying in a hostel away from him, he made me do it all by myself. He would be available for me all the time, but he would never directly help me. He made sure I did it all by myself. I was always angry that other kids don’t have to do anything, their parents lay out everything for them on the table and here I am running errands for myself. But now that I have grown up and have a new born of my own, I am so glad that my father made sure I do everything on my own. He made me independent and confident. He never smothered me with blind love. He made me strong. He did not lead the way but neither did he leave me alone. That is all I want for my own child now. Tough love made me the woman I am today. Its not that he never loved me. It is his love for me that made me a fiercely independent  woman today. As fate would have it, my husband is exactly the same as my father in this department so I have no worry for my child !

Stereotyping the Alpha Males

We humans have a tendency to complain a lot. That includes me as well. Any event that takes place in our lives and which doesn’t go your way , we end up complaining about it rather than doing anything about it 90% of the time.

Look at the gender discrimination around us. We women complain that men are dominating, that men behave life the Alpha of a wolf pack, that its a patriarchal society. But who made these rules? Who made these men believe that they are the Alphas? We DID!! We all did. We stereotyped men and women without even realizing it in the first place. And now we complain about it.  We women are called the weaker sex for example, we call our male family members/friends if we have a flat tyre. We don’t get out in the night without the company of a male friend and so on. I agree that physically we may not be as strong as our male companions but that doesn’t make us the weaker sex. Its just a matter of muscle strength. Leaving that aside, we are equals. There are woman excelling in every field sans the discrimination. But still, it is us who has stereotyped these alpha males.


We make our dads sit in the centre chair of the dinning table because he is the head of the family. Why isn’t the mother the head of the family? After all, she is the one feeding us the hot meal served on the table. And who gave the right to these alpha males to think that they own their female counterparts. We read about husbands and boyfriends hitting their woman. Where does this come from? They have this internal sense of superiority that makes them raise their hands on the own in front of them who takes all their shit and still stays with them. It is us who has stereotyped these alpha males into being who they are.


“He is a man, he is bound to behave this way”

“He works hard all day and hence he is frustrated so don’t mind if he takes it out no you”

“His ego is hurt because his wife earns more than he does”

We must have said or heard the above mentioned lines dozens of times not realizing that by saying or hearing such things and agreeing to them we are widening the gap between the genders which will not be easily reversible. This is the sad truth which entails the gender discrimination.


Morality these days

Has it ever occurred that bullying is on the increase these days ?That the honest are the ones suffering hunger and poverty ?That the good ones are always at the receiving end of abuses and name calling ?

The human race has forgotten that honesty and empathy are the essence of a good soul. By some recent events in my life it dawned upon me that when one is faced with the morality issue , siding with the right makes you the moron and sometimes the bad guy . Life is no longer black and white . There is a whole lot of grey now .

The Real Superheroes

First of all, a grand salute to all the woman of this world. Be it from any country, economic background and all other demographics. Its astounding how you do what you do.

After becoming a mother recently I realized what we are actually made of! Giving birth to another human being, making that tiny human from scratch and nurturing and caring for the child even before it is born, now that is marvelous. What follows after is more amazing. All mothers go through this, but only after going through it by myself did I realize its true essence. The sleepless nights, the exhaustion and the constant worry for your child. I think now I will always worry for my child till my last breathe. It has made me realize how much I took my parents for granted. Just like all the kids I thought my parents were just normal but now I know that they are super parents. Just like all parents, they too sacrificed so much for me. My mother is a super mom. She never stopped taking care of me, even now when I have a child of my own, my mother is there to take care of me. Now I know how she gets the strength. Its being a parent that makes you this strong.


In this new phase of my life, I am just juggling through the days. I have to take care of my baby, my family (including in laws), study and keep the home clean and a happy place. Phew!!! I don’t know how but I do manage to do most of the things I mentioned. The baby is my priority, but I also have to take care of others, take care of my own studies and still manage to stay up at night for my princess( yes, I have a baby girl). And I am not trying to sound too great as I know almost every other mom does this every day.  I am just acknowledging this for everyone, not just myself that what a great job all of you are doing out there. I feel tad bit bad that it never dawned upon me before.

Trying to do it all and yet surviving each day and keeping your family happy and healthy, all you mothers out there are the real superheroes. Much love to all of you.

Change is Good

It is bound to happen,

Sooner or later.

Change has its own mind,

Its lurks in the corner and pounces like a predator.

Change is good,

Change is inevitable.

Embrace it with open arms,

What has to happen will happen,

It is irrevocable.

Face it with a smile,

Even though the heart is timid.

Good things don’t come easy,

Life is all smooth sailing,

No room to be rigid.




The Cake Theory

Cakes are delicious! There isn’t anyone who won’t agree to this fact . I mean, deserts (cakes, tarts, fudges,etc.) look so inviting. We are attracted to them , staring at us through the glass window of a bakery, mocking us. Eruption of saliva leads to us entering the shop and buying ourselves the most calorie flowing , good looking cake. What happens after we eat it , lying in the bed at night? We regret it!! We regret having eaten the bundle of sweetness and diabetes and also that now its over, wishing  had saved it for later.

Doesn’t this happen in our daily lives often? We regret the decisions we make , we wish we hadn’t taken them in the first place, we wish that we had saved a bit of money for later. All these emotions come flowing when you twist and turn at night, unable to shake that feeling off!! TO HAVE THE CAKE OR EAT IT! 

Be it teenagers who wish they hadn’t dated someone, or if they did they hadn’t broken up with them so soon. Mothers who wish they had their children when the financials were stable , or if they regret not having as many kids back then and now there are medical issues holding them back. Head of the family working day and night to provide for his family and buy a home of their dreams or thinking that only if he had waited and saved more money the dream house would be bigger and better. Not to mention the people on diet who actually regret eating the cake!


All these are day to day emotions of us humans. So I would like call it the cake theory. We will always take decisions and we might regret them most of the times but life goes on. It turns out to be fine. We will work harder the next few days, mourn even, and then some new regret comes up and we concentrate on that. Its life. Life is full of risks but thats what makes it interesting. So eat you cake people and try to enjoy it!

The Indian Girl

You see her from a distance and you know she is Indian.

Its in her features, her stance.

The way her eyes look at you,

The way her dark hair dance.

The rainbow coloured bangles in her arms,

The kohl which makes her eyes mystic.

The shyness she shows,

Yet the confidence in her pose.

She is loving , caring.

Family values being her priority.

But there is the fierce fire in her,

Which can show people who is the supreme authority.

The Goddess of love and wisdom,

War and peace.

She is the Indian girl,

There ain’t nothing she can’t appease!




The point of it all….

I have often heard people expressing out loud, “Whats the point of it all?”

I mean, true, they are all exasperated at the moment and their feelings include ripping at someones throat like a hungry zombie, but , what is the point of it all? You waste your energy in being angry, expressing concern for a question which has no answer. Ponder over it,what can possibly be the answer for- “Whats the point?”

Like,hey!! I studied all my life. I am now a corporate slave. I work 9-5 througout the year. I have no life left. Whats the point of it all?


What can you possibly reply? I would really like to have the answer to that as my curiosity takes the better of me. So does everyone out there who has an existential crisis. There are some people who have dozens of degrees and do nothing , there are people who have only one, yet they do something spectacular with their lives.

Then again, there are humans who actually have answers to everything, including this. They will tell you acutely why they did what they did and how they achieved the things they desired to achieve. I must meet those humans!! They are the go-to people.

However, I personally feel that we should continue doing what we do while parallely figuring out the point of it all.