Stranger in the Mirror

” Its all about perception” said my psychology professor in my class where half the students were dozing off. I mean, obviously, if you sit in the lecture hall from morning till evening, thats what happens to you without a doubt.

This was almost two and a half years ago but I still have a recollection of the concept of “Perception”. A lot changed since the time I was in that lecture hall till where I am siting today typing on my Mac siting in the comfort of my home on a rainy day. Not to mention, since the time I was a college going student to now being a married woman. (Yep!! A lot of change.)

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I look at myself in the mirror and sometimes its hard to believe its me !! I am sure many of you must have had the same experience. Its like a stranger in the mirror looking back at you. Just a while ago I was a childish, carefree college going girl and now here I am running my own house, taking care of my entire family. How did that happen? I do not recognise the strange woman in that mirror. Do you sometimes look at yourself and do not recognise who that stranger is staring back at you.

I am sure just a while ago you must be the most popular kid in college and now you are a corporate slave, dark circles beneath your eyes, suit cladded with a 9-5 job and no life whatsoever. I am sure just a while ago you must be an upcoming designer and the stranger staring back to you is a mother taking care of three children and a husband , everything else forgotten.

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But again, you cannot be the most popular kid all your life, you cannot have all our old dreams come true when you overlap them with new ones. A corporate save is what the kid wanted to be to run his family, an amazing mother is what is keeping her family together and happy.

Its all about perception!  So accept that stranger in the mirror.

 

 

 

Wedding Ready-The final countdown

For months now, I have been going on and on about the Indian Weddings. How everyone reacts, feels and goes about with the customs and “traditions” .

I also know I have been off the grid lately but I have a very reasonable explanation for the same. The final countdown has begun!! The wedding everyone has been preparing for around me is in its final phase. Final touches are being given to everything. Final checklists are being prepared and finally I can see everyone losing their cool now and then. Also, did I mention the wonderful concept of ” wedding jitters” which every bride feels a few days before her wedding? It is indeed a feeling which has no measure. It can make you nauseous, make you rip someones’ head off, make you so emotional that you bust into tears even on the most silly things , and makes you love your family and friends more than ever.

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The poor groom has to forget his “jitters” in order to make the panicking bride feel better and safe. He does so much just to make sure she is happy in the marriage. Hats off to the groom for this . Indeed, this is the time when the bride knows how much the groom loves her and how much he is doing for her and everyone else just so that no one is upset. Be it the bride, the parents (both bride’s and the groom’s), or be it the relatives he has never met before. He keeps everyone happy.

Weddings aren’t that bad after all. They bring out these emotions with bring people closer. It also makes a few people crazy, but yeah, lets just focus on the good part today. It’s a huge step for the bride , a new life altogether. It’s all a part of life I guess. Change is inevitable.

On this note, I shall take leave. I have to do a bit of panicking myself. Oh, did I mention that I am the bride this time??!! It is the final countdown for this bride now.

Wedding Ready-Part IV

Shopping, shopping and shopping!!!! That’s what we hear the most in a wedding house. The aunts want to shop, the uncles have to pay. The kids want to shop, the mom’s have to pay. It goes on and on. The wedding industry sure never goes out of business, no matter what the economy is!!

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I have been busy for the past few weeks and I apologise. But I have a very reasonable explanation for it- I was busy shopping!! You see, marriage is not about two individuals promising to be a part of each other’s life. It’s also about buying ridiculously expensive stuff in the name of marriage. You buy everything new. Even the stuff you hardly ever use or maybe never use. It’s all about shopping. The bride buys everything new. Her entire wardrobe is new. Everything from her hairpin to her slippers, her toothbrush to her floss!! I mean, that must cost a fortune to tell you the truth and the parents are more than happy to spend all of the money. Their happiness lies in buying their daughter everything. Love is communicated in various ways in Indian marriages. Buy gracing your head and giving you a ten rupee note, or by buying you all the shit possible in the mall!! It’s all love.

I used to never understand the concept of gifts in marriages until I saw how happy the parents or relatives get when they gift their daughter something. I used to be of the mind that it is a sheer waste of money and resources, but then it hit me that sometimes you have to let go off the practicality and let the others do what makes them happy.

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So, ending on a happy colourful note here people . I need to go shop more !!

Wedding Ready-Part III

Weddings are all about numbers. Oh, and also family and relatives and all those other aspects. But first and foremost NUMBERS!!

How many people will attend the wedding? How much are you spending on the preparations? How many gifts are you joining to get?

And Indian weddings- how many gifts is the bride going to take along with her? How much jewellery is she taking? What is the cost of her attire? The number game goes on and on. I mean, the more the numbers, the better the status(supposedly).

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Oh, and was it mentioned that amongst all of this , the bride and groom are just silent spectators, siting and looking pretty. Their parents do everything but don’t forget that they do complete the formality of “asking” their kids regarding decisions . For example, “Son, we are doing this . You are fine by it, right?” , asks the father with a look which might pierce through the son’s skull. And the son nods and acknowledges the same. 

This is an on going process. Relatives, neighbours, friends, everyone is on superhero mode when it comes to weddings. They have the wedding preparations on their minds round the clock. It’s what makes them happy. It’s like the next big thing for them. Behind all the turmoil of the preparations is the love of the family and friends for the bride and the groom which is somehow hidden due to the pressures of the surroundings.

There are two sides to every story. This is the wedding story!!